just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
