Michael Bay diarrhea
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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