if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
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i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
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Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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