The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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