had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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