quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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