I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You took a bar mat shot.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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