You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize