Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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