i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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