I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
