He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
