Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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