The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
