I will die if light touches me.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
