i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
