Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Randomize
