Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
