I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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