hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
