He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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