think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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