yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize