Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
