Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
