Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm

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  (386): Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm http://tfl.nu/fmji
  Replies (12) Good night (728) Bad night (4287)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?

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  (818): what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand? http://tfl.nu/e114
  Replies (47) Good night (5676) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues

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  (917): you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues http://tfl.nu/bwbh
  Replies (7) Good night (4690) Bad night (1176)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea

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  (325): suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea http://tfl.nu/q0e7
  Replies (21) Good night (1038) Bad night (4737)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.

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  (702): No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up. http://tfl.nu/ztp2
  Replies (14) Good night (8352) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on

  (917): View more from New York City

  Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.

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  (516): Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on (917): Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something. http://tfl.nu/buau
  Replies (3) Good night (2562) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?

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  (828): Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober? http://tfl.nu/zgqd
  Replies (10) Good night (2011) Bad night (1401)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  haha i know

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  (406): i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt. (1-406): haha i know http://tfl.nu/vo1w
  Replies (21) Good night (7740) Bad night (1234)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  its not a party unless mikie exposes himself

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  (419): its not a party unless mikie exposes himself http://tfl.nu/ozsv
  Replies (5) Good night (2098) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.

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  (334): I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol (256): Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn. http://tfl.nu/f3y5
  Replies (9) Good night (2432) Bad night (833)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.

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  (903): Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis. http://tfl.nu/h9w8
  Replies (7) Good night (2058) Bad night (754)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.

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  (603): whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card. http://tfl.nu/d7h9
  Replies (6) Good night (2713) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  how bad is she

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  captain morgan with tits

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  (484): how bad is she (215): captain morgan with tits http://tfl.nu/5qnj
  Replies (7) Good night (1000) Bad night (2012)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.

  (281): View more from Texas

  i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.

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  (832): i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice. (281): i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building. http://tfl.nu/bxit
  Replies (2) Good night (766) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  we need to invent and abuse teleportation

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  (204): we need to invent and abuse teleportation http://tfl.nu/6ayp
  Replies (2) Good night (639) Bad night (286)

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