she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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