Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
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just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
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I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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