Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize