I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We got so high we made milksteak
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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