***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
