he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
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Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
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Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off