We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
