This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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