I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
