all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
