THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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