I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink