too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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