She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
no, he came in my armpit
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
