Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
