TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
