Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
