it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
