I just cut my nipple shaving
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
