You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
