Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
