Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize