if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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