i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
