i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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