Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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