butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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